What the hell am I thinking...

So i got into a small argument with my bf, and he left mad and here it is 10pm. I fell asleep and woke up at 11 hungry and upset, instead of making myself something sensible i binged on junk. A handfull of cashews, 3 dark chocolate truffles, my moms macaroni salad that was loaded with real mayo and sodium. A serving of Baked Cheddar mix by qakers and 3 meringue cookies. Whats worse is I was alone and had to use my Breathing treatment nebulizer machine again tonight because my asthma is getting out of control. At night it is worse and I wake up not able to breathe, weezing and caughing and the rescue inhaller isnt working so much. I find myself having to use it every 2-3 hours, I am afraid that I will end up having to walk around with oxygen! There are alot of things on my mind at the moment which is why I binged, because I didnt want to deal with all the emotions I was feeling. I don't understand why I do these things to myself, and to think that I am so close to my goal I can feel it, but what do I do... I havnt done a damn thing in the way of excersise, and I am hating myself for it. Its just that I am plain Lazy, I thought the book I bought from bob would help, i feel like its shit I already know and that I waisted my money. He wants you to walk 20 minutes 3-4 times a week for 4 weeks. Ok that is something i already know, and the other core/strength training stuff he has I already did in my Denise Austin DVD's.... Maybe that was what triggered my mood in the first place. Im using his computer and his keyboard sucks so excuse my typing....