It's ok to have days like these. They happen and they are healthy. Just don't beat yourself up about it!! You have the power to start over at any time, so maybe when you wake up tomorrow just put EVERYTHING behind you and start fresh. That's the beautiful thing about being in control. At least you know that there are emotions you are trying to avoid. This is the first step to a healthier you, and the first step to dealing with these emotions!! Hang in there!
Lots of emotions are scary for me too. Just writing about them will help, keep it up!And yeah, hang in there!