Thursday, January 7, 2010

Uggg, and I was doing so well :(

Man I really started off the new year on great terms as far as taking care of myself, eating right and moving it. The weather was so nice on Monday, the sun was shinning and it was warmer. Went for a nice 2 mile walk up to the shopping center and back home and it felt great! Tuesday was OK eating was great and even tho it was so cold and gloomy out I went for a walk anyways. As for yesterday I was so depressed all I did was lay in bed and eat, I had 3000 calories and most was cheese and Chocolate, I feel so defeated. I am thankfully feeling better today, tho my day just kinda started so who knows what it will bring. I started TOM yesterday so I guess that accounts for why I was feeling the way I did. I did however see a dozen programs about weight loss and the Obesity epidemic in America, I learned some new things that could help me out allot. I thought that I had conquered my demons and got past the mental crap that was holding me back, but yesterday I realized that I didn't and it is all still there. They cut Mental health out of the county medical services as well as Social Security. So therefore if I need to see someone I have to pay out of pocket, and so unless they take LINT I'm sol and it sucks. I have been researching and calling everywhere with nothing and no help. I have really no friends to speak of that can help to just talk about things with other than my BF who is my best friend but he already knows and really cannot offer any more help. But that is understandable. So I am not beating myself up for slipping, it was one day and it isn't going to ruin anything as long as I can pick myself out of the stupor and press on!

5 comments:

  1. i'm hesitant to suggest this because i haven't followed your blog very carefully or for very long, but if you need mental health services in a non-urgent way (basically, talk therapy/counseling) look for things like support groups or clergy-- maybe not as specialized as a psychologist, but something is better than nothing. i'm not what you'd call religious, but i'm pretty sure that if you go to them, they're mostly obligated to help.

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  2. What about a local college - they may have studies going on in their Psych depts.

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  3. one day off does not a disaster make! Just a bump in the road. You can do it! I know that Lyn at escape from obeistity has been noting that her monthy cycles have a very real effect on her eating. Very interesting reading there. :)

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  4. Hey Becca. I just wanted to lend my support to you! Even with insurance it is very difficult and expensive. I'm doing really well on Lexapro, but found out that it is not covered by my insurance, so it would be $100 out of pocket. The doctor is trying to get it covered. There are some really great suggestions above for the counseling! I know Vitamin D does take the edge off of my moods a bit.

    Well, I hope you start to feel better soon. The sun will be here before you know it! Keep up the good fight girlie! You CAN do it! :o)

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  5. 1 day of slippage isn't a bad thing. YOu can pick it back up. We all have bad days (me... on end lately) and you've picked yourself up before so you KNOW you can do it again. :)

    As for insurance and some one to talk to. I know here in Phx Az there are outlets for cheaper services. Such as Catholic services, etc... you don't have to be catholic either. My brother has used catholic services here in town when things get really bad for him and he has no insurance and they've made it affordable. i don't know details, but there are outlets. You just have to research them. in the mean time... Just be good to yourself and find a way to get those feelings out... be it your journal here or a hand written journal. i found staying bottled up (due to no one to talk to) makes me worse until I explode... Better to write it down than get worse. Anyhow... Good luck and keep your head up! You're doing great!!!

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